The things we look for
by melikenoother
Summary: When something unexpected happens it's up to Hotch, Rossi, and a new member of the team to solve the riddle. The problem is that all is a riddle, and the key to a riddle...is another riddle.
1. Chapter 1

None of the characters belong to me, nor am I making any profit. Hope you guys like this story and REVIEW! But be nice and constructive. Anyways… here we go! 

P.S. All of the chapters will be from the new member's point of view. We begin in the present, but we will go back in time for the next few chapters. 

**August 12****th****,**

**9:47AM, somewhere in Washington D.C**

"We acquire the strength we have overcome." Ralph Waldo Emerson

"_Damn what an expensive UnSub…" _

There are moments that take your breath away and this one was sure to be one of them. I was staring at the note for what felt like hours, when in reality it couldn't have been more than a minute. I was staring, I wasn't sure I was breathing and there was such pounding in my ears I couldn't hear my own thoughts. I wanted to puke. I felt dizzy, weak… I was never as terrified as I was in that moment. Nothing and I mean nothing prepared me for this. No amount of studying, pep-talking, self-assurances made me ready for what happened. I was frozen and for the first time in my life, well… I didn't know what to do? I just stood there… and stood.

After what felt like forever, I snapped out of the daze. I still felt this terror in my bones, and dizziness, but I could move again. That was something at least. My brain however, refused to cooperate. I couldn't for the life of me formulate a coherent thought. _"Damn, what an expensive unsub_" didn't count. That wasn't normal response that was… I don 't know what it was, but it sure as hell wasn't normal. I think I started to feel though. And I panicked.

Peopled passed me, no one paid me any attention, and I knew no one will. Then, I remembered… _call Dave. Yea, that's right, that's what you will do Karoline, you will call Dave, and it'll be ok, he'll fix it, he always does._ But, trying to find the phone was almost impossible. My hands shook so bad that It took me forever to just find the phone in my bag. Then, I was supposed to make a call. "_Right, one step at the time. You can do this. It's easy, piece of cake!" _

I don't remember dialing the number, but the next thing I know Dave answered: _"Karo? You ok? Karo… are you there? Answer me? Are you ok?_" In the back of my mind, I registered that he was getting worried. But, it was all out of body experience. I did things mechanically. I didn't remember doing them, I didn't feel like it was me doing all these things, but it must have been.

Speaking proved to be a challenge. I didn't think how I was going to tell him, I didn't think of really anything. I just did it, and now when I was supposed to tell him, I didn't know how.

"_Dave…_ "

"_Karo, are you all right? You don't sound all right. What's going on? "_

"_I…uh… I got a message from someone. I… oh God…" I think that my throat closed. There was a lump in my throat the size of Texas, and for the life of me, I couldn't get rid of it._

"_Karoline, what message? From whom? Is it your mother? A Friend?" _

When he asked me that I felt like laughing. Not the HA HA Ha, funny kind of laugh. More like, panicked, I am losing my mind kind of laugh. I chocked on it and my eyes filled with tears.

"_Um, no, no, nothing like that. I, the kid, and I don't know! Ughh! Ok, I was walking and the kid came up to me! But I didn't know him, right? And he came to me, and he gave me a paper. And the paper said that Garcia, Morgan, JJ and Emily have been kidnapped. And… and, I thought it was a joke! But it's not funny! It's not funny! Who would joke like that? It's not right._" I think I was babbling, but I just couldn't seem to stop. So I bit my cheek, to stop because I was going to have a real panic attack If I didn't.

"_Karo, you need to calm down. Ok? You need to tell me exactly what happened. From the beginning to the end, ok?_ " Dave's voice was calm, logical, assured, and like many times before, he brought me from the brink of a panic attack and once again, I could think clearer, I was still shaking, my adrenaline was still rushing through my veins, but at least I could talk and think.

So I told him everything, from me walking and sightseeing to the kid, and the money, and the message. Everything. Every single detail that I thought was important, and few that probably weren't, but I told him anyways, because I was afraid to miss anything that might help.

After I was done Dave said: "_Ok, now this is what you are going to do. You are going to get a cab, come to FBI office, and meet me there__. "_

That sounded reasonable to me, but I couldn't help but ask "_What are you going to do?"_

"_I am going to call the guys, just in case, see if they answer. If not, I will call Hotch, since, he wasn't on the list, it's safe to assume he wasn't involved. And then we'll meet you there. Ok?"_

I finished the call, and told myself to relax, shit happened for a reason. And it won't do me any good if I fall apart now. Now, I had to go and meet Dave. I could break down later, when I was alone. For now, I was going to do what Dave said.

I was still scared, panicked really, but I knew what I had to do, and knew for sure, that this wasn't random, this was a message inside the message. The question was what was the purpose? Why?

So, I walked, got onto the street, raised my hand and yelled "_Taxi!"_ on top of my lungs.

I got into the cab and simply said "_Quantico."_

"Strength is a matter of a made up mind." John Beecher


	2. There are good days and bad days

**Not mine, not earning any profit. Here is another chapter. Hope you like it. Review and read.**

**August 12****th**

**10:17AM On the way to Quantico**

"There are good days and there are bad days, and this is one of them."

Lawrence Welk

The ride in the cab took forever, or at least in my mind it did. I had too much time to think, too much time to reflect on ifs, whens, whys. .. it gave me a headache. I was trying to remember if I missed something. If I did, it could cost Morgan, JJ, Emily, Garcia and Reid their lives. I wasn't sure if that was the burden I could live with for the rest of my life. I was always so damn sure I could do this job, be like Dave, but now I had my doubts. I had the knowledge, I just wasn't sure if I could withstand the pressure. It turns out real life is very different and the main question wasn't if I can talk the talk ( I already knew I could recite the talk ), no, the real question was can I walk the walk?

I remember having a dinner with Dave before I was to join San Francisco State Psych program. He had the same worries.

We were sitting in a restaurant right after the divorce from my mother. This was their third marriage and Dave thought he should take me out to celebrate my enrollment, since who knew when we will see each other again. My mom and Dave didn't exactly part on the best of terms and since Dave was my favorite step dad of them all, I was more than happy to hang out with him.

The dinner was good, the company better, but Dave was worried. He was thinking of returning to BAU and unsure if that was what he wanted to do. He wasn't sure if coming out of the retirement was the right move. He was also worried since I have expressed desire to join once I finish my B.A. and my M.A.

I was always looking up to him and it was no surprise I wanted to follow in his footsteps.

_"Dave…Tell me what's bothering you? You look spaced out. "_

_"Oh I'm just thinking if you should be at the BAU."_

That made me pause. I was angry and hurt that the one person who supported my desired career choice seemed to be in doubt. I wasn't sure If I could go through it all by myself.

First thing that happened was that my guard went.

"_Why? Do you think I can't do it? Because I think you are wrong. I think I can."_

_"No, no, no, Karo, you got it wrong. This job, and everything that comes with it can be hard. Hell, it can be more than hard. It sometimes feels like you are drowning and there is no way out. It's hell on your personal life. Look at me, three failed marriages, and I'm not the only one. The team, all of us who do this are scarred one way or another, not to mention that we basically live for the job. I just don't want you to wake up one day and realize you are alone and it's too late to do anything about it. I just don't want you to wake up one day and realize that you understand the unsub better than you understand your neighbor. That's all. "_

After he fell silent I was amazed. This was a long speech for Dave. He was good at listening, not so good at actual talking.

I remember thinking that was a nice advice, something that went into one ear and came out of the other. Since the atmosphere became a bit tense I decided to avoid and lighten up the conversation.

_"Dave, I don't think your failed marriages have a much do with work, and a lot more to do with your love for women. Can you honestly tell me that things would have been different if you were a salesman, or a professor of history or something like that? Second, someone has to do it, and I want to be that someone. Third, we all carry scars; one way, or the other. And lastly, you can call my mom now and tell her you did your part of trying to persuade me not to join BAU after my MA."_

He laughed because he knew I was right. I wonder what my mom did to blackmail him into talking me out of it. It didn't work, and he wasn't trying hard enough, so we just went back to the dinner.

But, now, years later, I had a glimpse of what he was trying to tell me. I thought I understood better. I wanted to make him proud, so I wasn't going to quit. I wasn't sure I could do it either, bit someone once said that the professional was a person who didn't quit. I just hoped that asshole didn't lie.

My thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of my phone. I think my heart stopped for a second and my hand shook. I took a deep breath, let it out, and answered.

"_Karo, I called everyone, but only Hotch answered. He has been briefed on the situation and agents have been sent to check out the homes of the rest of the team. " _

"_But it's more than likely that whoever sent me the message wasn't pulling a prank?"_

"_Yea, more than likely. Are you ok?"_

Now I could have said no because the truth was, I was anything but, however, I was going to help anyway I could, and I couldn't see Big Shot Hotch wanting the help of a hair brained, scared girl.

"_Of course. I am fine. Nothing has happened to me. I am ok. "_

He didn't sound totally convinced, but he let it go for now, and changed the subject.

"_Are you going to be at Quantico soon? "_

Since I had no idea, having never been in this area, I asked the driver.

"_Dave, I should be there in half an hour or so. I'll call you the moment I get there."_

We finished the call, and by that point I was much calmer. That is, I was, until I remembered that it was me that the message was delivered to. I went back to the incident in question trying to understand what has happened.

I am walking, sightseeing, thinking that life couldn't get any better when a little 10-12 year old boy with a bicycle came up to me and said:

_"Hey, a man wanted me to give you this."_

And as the boy gave me this little paper, I had a feeling that things were going to get bad.

I opened the note and read the words that made my head spin and my heart speed up:

"**I have the four members of the BAU. Morgan, Prentiss, Garcia and Dr. Reid. Payback is a bitch… If you want them, come and claim them."**

As I stared incomprehensibly into the note, the boy turned to me and said:

_"Can I get my $50 now? The man said I'll get paid when I deliver this to you."_

_"What does the man look like?"_ I asked

But the boy just shrugged, completely unconcerned_ "I don't, he had a baseball hat and was wearing a jacket that covered his face. Can I get my money now?_ "

As I dug into my purse without thinking to give this boy the money I couldn't help but think _"Damn, what an expensive unsub…"_

"The difference between school and life? In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson."

Tom Bodett


End file.
